I Love My Effen Kids!

From left to right~ Gavin, Paetyn, Deven 

Man my kids are retarded.... They fight and snark on an hourly basis, some days I completely understand why animals eat their children. Today my son got his ADHD medicine a few hours late and he was so full of energy that I swear he sounded like a transformer.

*Hummm..... Mom mom mom mom mom... pop tart, I wanna pop tart! Mom mom...Hummm....*

I wanted to strangle them in Lowes. We went to pick up a few more plants for my veggie garden and people were looking at me like I fed them Crack Brownies for breakfast.

Luckily for them I have invested precious genetic material, resources, and time into the little heathens.So strangling them is not such a great idea. (Side note: I hear it may actually be illegal as well.)

If I ever did decided to terminate them, it would be wise of me (as a mammal) to actually re-ingest all of that hard work... All the vitamins and minerals that I graciously gave them in utero...  not to mention the massive amount of resources invested since birth.

But, to be honest I don't eat much red meat.. Before you interject, Yes, I have heard (from some) that they taste more like chicken... they obviously haven't read this article that says it is more like beef.

What?!? If you spent months making a Cheese Nip... then you kept said Cheese Nip safe (from would-be Cheese Nip nappers) for years... you wouldn't just toss it in the trash would you? Of course not.. if someone is going to nom on your Nip it should be you. LMAO

So I suppose if I was feeling extra murdery one day, I could just order this product and fulfill my craving for offspring flesh.

Nom Nom Nom

So... since rendering them to stew isn't a viable option any longer. I do a lot of breathing and counting and finger pointing... If I combine the finger pointing with the classic *mommy has crazy eyes* expression they usually react with the appropriate amount of fear and awe and behave.

That's all for now. Mwah!
Cyb